Dear McDonald's, Culver's, Burger King, Taco Bell, KFC, Wendy's, Domino's, Cousin's and Subway
I am writing to tell you that I will not be coming around any more. Obviously we have had some good times. Particularly you McDonald's with your value menu and affordable junk food. We really have made quite the team. I would say most people have not appreciated you the way I have. The two cheeseburger value meal brings back particular memories. It is almost the perfect garbage meal. If you take time to "get it ready" before you drive off. Placing the french fries perfectly on the burgers and adding ketchup......it really was an artistic experience. And it is cheap enough where you can easily tack on an extra double cheeseburger. And don't get me started on the actual dollar menu. I am sure I am not the only one who has done it but I probably invented it. The McDouble-Chicken Jetta Classsic. It calls for a McDouble with a McChicken jammed in the middle add ketchup and obviously you have to do it twice. The Jetta part is I would "craft" it in the car and eat it there as a dude like me does not eat that in front of someone else. In fact I rarely eat in front of others excluding family. I have been made fun of at every job at some point for being the "fat guy who never ate" I really am not sure what that is about but it was true. OK back to the point. I am breaking up with you ladies because I know that you suck and in a very short time I will not need you. I would say about three weeks from now I will not even think of you any more. The smallest thought of you will make me feel just a little sick. Once I lose the taste for you your existence in my mind becomes what you really are. Gross foul tasting garbage.....A Bad Habit.
So sorry to be rude but sometimes the truth hurts.
Good Luck to you.
Sincerely,
Clint J Gritt
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